Truffles & Teas: Another school year just flew by

Sometimes I wish I was back in grade school. The years from 8th grade through 12th were absolutely lovely for me - grueling, stimulating, joyful, stressful, promising, and frustrating all at the same time. However, I have no intention of going through puberty again, worrying over what to do with my life when I 'grow up.'

Not until high school did I get quite taken up with learning for the sheer gratification of it, lingering in academia much longer than average, assuming, possibly falsely, that the depth of my knowledge somehow is tied to the strength of my identity. Which, at last stock-taking wasn't that deep or that strong respectively.

The one thing I would staunchly proclaim is that my teachers most definitely influenced me in ways even they don't know, and still influence me today, as I raise my kids. What power and bliss it is to be a teacher - to mold the next generation.

Now that another school year is coming to a close for my kids, I try not to live through them but let them have this experience to cherish what they hold dear. Part of me is terribly impatient, wanting them to grow up fast so I can see what sort of individuals they become as adults; but, part of me wants to preserve this carefree period in their lives which nostalgia claims as the halcyon days.

I chastise myself sometimes for not being the sort of mom who takes pictures of her kids on their first day of school each year, and possibly last day of school, and making cute scrapbook pages recording their growth and accomplishments each year as they develop by leaps and bounds. I think measurable achievements and accomplishments are secondary to who they become and how they see themselves as they grow -- always ready to set goals for themselves and working hard to get there, but, never straying far from the big picture of what it all means to lead a good life.

Anyway, I am rambling. This year, the older child decided to put together cute Mason Jar gifts for all the teachers in school who touched her in one way or another: The Truffles & Teas Mason Jar!

Keeping in mind that teachers have enough well-meaning gifts that students give them each year, and that they only have limited space in their lives to keep all the hand-made things their students give them, the older child decided to give a small handmade item that is utilitarian: a colorful loom loop coaster. Plus, who doesn't like tea? So, some tea bags. And, being a huge fan of dark chocolate, she decided to stash some bite-size chocolate treats for her teachers. A handmade card filled with heartfelt words about how each person influenced her rounded out the package.

No plans for summer camps for the older child - although she might enjoy a few select ones if only I can afford to enroll her. She might get lonesome but not really bored, I tell myself...  Downtime is essential for creativity to take root. She might set herself a goal or two and try to reach them by the end of summer. Or not. Who knows?

p.s: The younger child decided to make a Flip Book for his teacher - something that doubles as a notepad, which a teacher can not have enough of. Plus a handwritten note and card and some tea+chocolate. The flip book just has this little seahorse (stamped) that floats about and tumbles and such, along with a bird that flies off its branch and dives in the water and floats to the top.

I've worked with your flower

There are many wonderful words, some simple and delicate, some rich and complex, which when strung together in a certain sequence can squeeze the heart and overpower our emotions.

My mom being a retired high school teacher, I know how much she loved all her kids. (I must admit, it used to make me a bit cross when she said "my kids" when referring to the school kids - my friends - she taught).

Though not choked with emotion to the point of weeping, I know my mom felt a pang of something every summer when a batch of kids moved on to college after high school. She remembers many of her kids, if not by name, but by where they sat in the class, what worked best to get them interested in the topics, how they did their lab work, sometimes even their handwriting and their smile!

Anyway, I came across this little poem when Ana recently finished KG, and I do believe her teacher teared up a bit and got emotional when it was time to say good-bye to the outgoing kids. To cherish that moment, I quote this poem as it seems quite timeless. (Author unknown; please drop a note if you are the author or know who wrote this, authoritatively).

I've worked with your flower,
And helped it to grow.
I'm returning it now,
But I want you to know...

This flower is precious,
As dear as can be.
Love it, take care of it,
And you will see...

A bright new bloom,
With every day.
It grew and blossomed
In such a wonderful way.

In September just a bud,
January, a bloom;
Now a lovely blossom
I'm returning in June.

Remember, this flower,
As dear as can be,
Though rightfully yours,
Part will always belong to me!

Bye-bye Kindergarten

When I was growing up, "Graduation" was a term reserved for when one first earned one's college degree. There was usually some sort of convocation ceremony to recognize the achievement, and justified pomp and splendor around the awarding of the degree certificate. I got all of my four degree certificates by mail, being chronically shy to don the traditional vestments and walk up in front of strangers when my name was called.

I got to thinking about these as Ana geared up for her mini rite-of-passage-of-sorts getting out of the comfortable shelter of her Montessori pre-school at her recent kindergarten graduation. I like that while it is a solemn ceremony, very affirmative and inspiring, it also serves to reiterate the fact the learning is ongoing; and as they transition to different environments, setting goals and working to achieve them, whatever they may be, the children can look back on all that they have achieved so far, without even knowing they did, absorbing and developing their innate abilities in a rich and conducive atmosphere.

Update: had to add this here for my reference - a direct quote from utbtkids who usually manages to say things that are bouncing around as disjointed thoughts in my head:

"Getting to say proper goodbye, however painful it is, is an absolute necessity, especially for children. They learn that their old friends did not just vanish, but are still there and it gives them the confidence to make new friends in the new environment."

That was what the KG graduation was about, for me and for Ana, and for the handful of kids who are moving on.

To acknowledge and validate their feelings - after spending 3+ years with the same teacher, friends, environment, and then to suddenly feel booted out into a new one - can be tough, at least for some kids, as was evident in the strange behaviors noted during the last few weeks of school. While there was an ongoing addressing of it in classroom, the ceremony gave a sort of closure.

Each child is different... I have a feeling Oggie will handle it differently from Ana, being an extrovert of sorts from what I've observed so far. Ana, on the other hand, being shy and withdrawn, doesn't embrace change as easily. Added to it is the fact that, thanks to my non-social nature, all she has known is school and home as safe havens, nothing much else...

---

The graduating kindergartners write a book about themselves. I was quite surprised to see that among the other things she had written about herself, Ana had the only thing she didn't like: "I don't like getting hurt." That's it. The only thing she doesn't like is getting hurt. That spoke to me on many levels - her shyness, which much like mine, seems more about getting the feelings hurt than actually being scared of the people. Of course, she probably only meant physical hurt, but, having heard her state clearly, "that hurt my feelings" appropriately, I believe she knows what she is talking about...

The teacher then says a few words briefly and directly to each child as they come up after their Bubble Walk, sharing the moments they want to highlight in the child's life at school. It is a sweet ceremony, ending with a tear-jerker of a song.

One of the traditions of graduating kindergartners is the Self-Portrait. It is a guided process, but entirely done by kids.

They look in the mirror, study themselves, sketch, erase, sketch, edit, sketch on black paper till they are satisfied.

Then they use glue for the outline much like the Glue and Chalk Pastel art project we've shared here before. The results are stunning. And, it always amazes me to see how the children see themselves, the details they notice in themselves.

A fascinating "experiment" as Oregon's Poet Laureate Paulann Petersen referred to it in an NPR interview, is the system of public education. Used to be that only the privileged few could get an education as it was expensive and beyond easy reach. But, the fact that education is open and available for all who wish to avail of the opportunity was the biggest thing that impressed me when I heard about it as a fresh graduate doing internship teaching High School Physics in India to kids who were not much younger than me.

Today, it pains me to see many kids dropping out of school, the funding for public school system in jeopardy, the spiraling issues as a result... And, now that Ana is out of a non-profit private pre-school, gearing up for stepping into the public school system, I feel the gap, I feel the inadequacy, I feel the need to provide her with an environment that lets her learn at her own pace, getting a joyful education fit for future leaders of our world. I am digressing...

In the larger scheme of things, KG is KG - I remember LKG and UKG (Lower/Upper KG) when I was little, and by 1st standard kids were taught cursive writing, but not much reading... so, I am grateful that Ana is coming out of KG a confident reader favoring chapter books even if her penmanship is not anywhere near perfect...

When Ana gets her first college degree, I guess I'll truly feel comfortable saying "Ana graduated!", but for now, it is Bye-bye KG, Hello First Grade!

Happy Summer!

Vernal Bereftitude

After bawling inconsolably for most of the afternoon, throwing uncharacteristic tantrums and refusing to get interested in anything else, even her favorite trio of Harry-Ron-Hermione discovering Hogwarts, Ana finally helped me understand the reason for her sadness: she did not want it to be the last day of school.

I know how she feels. Well, sort of. I used to get that empty, forlorn feeling after annual exams every year. Relieved that I don't have to go to school everyday for many many days to come, and knowing that I could do anything I wanted to do, I used to really want to go to school.

The parapet wall where I'd sit for hours talking with my best friend, the cozy little Ayah's hut where she'd lovingly make us a cup of tea that smelled like kerosene smoke and orange pekoe, the nook in the upstairs library where I'd sit longingly scanning the shelves vowing to read every one of the books before the year ends, my desk and chair in my classroom right in the front row corner with its nicks and cuts and forbidden carvings... everything turned magical when school was out for summer.

And Ana, at some level, in some subtle way that her sensitive mind comprehends, is experiencing this bereftitude...

I wish I could tell her it will be all right. I wish I could help her understand that while it will be different when she goes back next year, it will still be the same school, the same teachers she knew and loved, it will still have the same friends more or less, maybe even some new ones, and in the end it will all work out.

And, it might so happen that she would have to go to a different school, with different teachers and friends... it would still be fine, she'll shine...

But for now, all I wish to offer my little girl is plenty of hugs, a host of exciting activities, and an opportunity to see-experience-understand our world as best as her tender mind can...

Summer Book List

Being an SAHM for the last 6 months has given me a chance to spend a lot of time with my kids, some of which seem magical while others are best forgotten. I got a clear measure of my patience and stamina. I also got a surprisingly good inkling of how rewarding it can be - moments that just take my breath away.

Ana has asserted her creativity and stubbornness confidently over the last half-year, while Oggie has been hitting his milestones right under my watch. The humming bird that she is, our visits to the park several times a week has shown me the importance of expending the pent up energy in a 3-yr old in a constructive way. The cuddly-poo that he is, Oggie has shown me how relaxing it can be to lay him on my chest and enjoy our times on the rocker/glider without looking at the clock and worrying about not getting enough sleep to function in a coherent and professional manner at the office the next day :)

This change of pace also gave me an opportunity to make several library visits with Ana and Oggie. We read an average of 3-4 books every 10-12 days. Not all those books are worth writing individual reviews here or at Saffron Tree. Some were a big hit with Ana, although I couldn't see why, whereas others were quite a lot of fun to read with nothing special to offer, while still others made me wonder how they got published in the first place... but, every once in a while we hit upon some delightful and clever books, for which I have written individual reviews here and at Saffron Tree.

Just for my own records and perhaps to help fellow mommies, I am listing some of the recent books we read over this summer that warrant at least a brief mention since Ana enjoyed them.

	A Was an Apple Pie (Letters, Numbers and Colors) by Etienne Delessert. Creative Editions (2005), Hardcover, 32 pages
	The Absent-Minded Toad by Javier Rondon. Kane/Miller Book Publishers (2002), Paperback, 28 pages
	Alfred Digs by Lindsay Barrett George. Greenwillow (2008), Hardcover, 40 pages
	The Baker's Dozen: A Counting Book by Dan Andreasen. Henry Holt and Co. (BYR) (2007), Hardcover, 32 pages
	Click, Clack, Splish, Splash: A Counting Adventure by Doreen Cronin. Atheneum (2006), Hardcover, 24 pages
	Cookies: Bite-Size Life Lessons by Amy Krouse Rosenthal. HarperCollins (2006), Hardcover, 40 pages
	Colors Everywhere: A Guess How Much I Love You Storybook (Guess How Much I Love You) by Sam Mcbratney. Candlewick (2007), Edition: Brdbk, Board book, 24 pages
	Color Zoo by Lois Ehlert. HarperCollins (1989), Edition: 1st ed, Hardcover, 40 pages
	Leaf Man by Lois Ehlert. Harcourt Children's Books (2005), Hardcover, 40 pages
	Elmer by David McKee. Grupo Editorial Norma (2005), Paperback, 32 pages
	Flotsam (Caldecott Medal Book) by David Wiesner. Clarion Books (2006), Edition: 1, Hardcover, 40 pages
	Gallop!: A Scanimation Picture Book (Scanimation Books) by Rufus Butler Seder. Workman Publishing Company (2007), Hardcover, 12 pages
	Henny Penny by Vivian French. Bloomsbury Publishing PLC (2007), Paperback, 32 pages
	How To be A Baby . . . By Me, The Big Sister by Sally Lloyd-Jones. Schwartz & Wade (2007), Hardcover, 40 pages
	Hurry! Hurry! by Eve Bunting. Harcourt Children's Books (2007), Edition: Library Binding, Hardcover, 40 pages
	In a Blue Room by Jim Averbeck. Harcourt Children's Books (2008), Edition: 1, Hardcover, 32 pages
	Llama, Llama Red Pajama by Anna Dewdney. Viking Juvenile (2005), Hardcover, 40 pages
	Move Over, Rover! by Karen Beaumont. Harcourt Children's Books (2006), Edition: 1, Hardcover, 40 pages
	Mouse Paint: Lap-Sized Board Book by Ellen Stoll Walsh. Red Wagon Books (2006), Edition: 1, Board book, 30 pages
	One More Bunny: Adding from One to Ten by Rick Walton. HarperCollins (2000), Hardcover, 24 pages
	Scoot! by Cathryn Falwell. Greenwillow (2008), Hardcover, 32 pages
	Snowmen at Night by Caralyn Buehner. Dial (2002), Hardcover, 32 pages
	Ten Little Sleepyheads by Elizabeth Provost. Bloomsbury USA Children's Books (2005), Hardcover, 32 pages
	Time Out, Buzzy by Harriet Ziefert. Blue Apple Books (2006), Hardcover, 32 pages
	When Sheep Sleep by Laura Numeroff. Abrams Books for Young Readers (2006), Edition: Library Binding, Hardcover, 32 pages

P(r)ep Talk!

Summer is coming to a close and Ana needs to start new preschool. I am a little apprehensive. I've taken her to visit the new school several times so far. We met with her new teacher last week. I think she will eventually adjust to the new school and routine, but, as of now, here's how our prep talks have gone:

Me: Ana, remember the new school we went to visit? You will be going to the new school soon.
Ana: Yep, I remember.
Me: You like the new school, right?
Ana: Yep.
Me: Yasmin won't be your teacher anymore. You'll have a new teacher Katie.
Ana: I like Yasmin. I want to go see her.
Me: Well, maybe tomorrow we can see Yasmin for a little while, OK? But, remember, you'll have new friends in your new school. Paulina and Amelie won't be there in your new school. You'll meet Eli and Asa and others.
Ana: I like Paulina. I want Paulina to go to my new school.
Me: I think Paulina's Mom wants her to stay in the old school, so, Paulina won't come to your new school. You'll meet new friends you can play with in your new school, OK?
Ana: I will call Paulina on the phone and tell her to come to my new school.
Me: Paulina may not want to come, Ana. You'll learn lots of new fun stuff in the new school.
Ana: But, I don't want to learn new stuff, Amma. I don't want new friends. I want to play with Paulina.
*Sigh* End Session.

Me: Ana, in two weeks you will start new school, remember?
Ana: Yep.
Me: Are you excited? Are you happy to go to your new school?
Ana: Nope.
Me: Why not?
Ana: I don't know...
Me: You can learn to read in the new school! yay! You can read all your own books... you can read your books to me then!
Ana: I don't want to read my books to you, Amma. You can read your own books. I don't want to learn to read.

*Sigh* Got off on the wrong foot. Abort Session.

Well, you get the picture...

Having gone to daycare from 6 months onwards, I am sure she will adjust eventually. Her daycare caregivers have taught her a lot - including grace & courtesy, singing & dancing, a certain amount of responsibility regarding her personal items, her body, as well as responsibility towards fellow students.

Her Independence blossomed as she learned to control her body movements and care for herself. Ana could eat by herself at age 9 months, even though she didn't get her first tooth till 10 months. She learnt to say "Thank You" and "Please" even before I insisted on being polite at home. She started putting on her own socks and shoes by 15 months, thanks to velcro™ shoe fasteners, and she could dress herself by age 2, needing just minimal assistance with buttons and hooks. Having two kitties at home gave her the opportunity to care for and treat our animal friends with respect - most days now, at age 3, she likes to fill the kitties' bowl with cat food, and put out some water for them.

I am trying not to lay unnatural emphasis on academic achievements... a good education must also attempt to round out her character and help her to intuit and discover, rather than turn her into a passive learner, suppressing her innate streak of creativity and curiosity... which is what makes *me* nervous about her starting school.

Home Schooling [October Poll]

For a while, before Ana came into our lives, I was quite fascinated with the concept of home schooling. With a freshly earned Master's in Science Education, I was green and gung-ho about being a noble teacher for the rest of my life.

But, over the years I have had the time think a lot more, and, of course, Life happened. Somewhere along my several years of dabbling in higher education, I realized how ingrained it is that many students are led to believe that "Those Who Can Do, Those Who Can't Teach"! And, so, I stepped away from teaching, despite knowing what a wonderful career my mom has had as a teacher.

To this day, when I walk along with her in our city when I visit her, we invariably run into some strapping lad/lass walking hurriedly, frantically waving to catch our attention and greet my mom with a "Hello Ma'm! Do you remember me?!", hoping she would immediately connect the acne-faced, precocious 11^th or 12^th grader to the confident young person standing in front of her, beaming, exuding success!

Strangely enough, 95% of the time, my mom actually remembers the name, the "batch", the whole class and even a few special incidents associated with that person.

Why I liked homeschooling?

• Flexibility: regarding curriculum, time-schedule, and assignments
• Tailoring: if I see my child inclined more towards one area, it gives me a chance to give individual attention and foster that trait better
• Safety: Not much peer pressure, no negative and bad influences to fall trap to easily and get distracted from educational goals
• Family Life: rather than revolve around the demands of school timing, homework and exams, getting educated revolves around the family needs and family priorities, and if there are siblings being home schooled as well, all the better, they can learn from each other without pressure
• Positive Attitude: learning could potentially become a joyful discovery rather than a chore and a stress-generator: children don't have to wake up an hour early to get ready and commute to school, don't have to deal with bullies and punishment, don't have to endure boredom that becomes part of school life sometimes
• Immediate Access to the Teacher: Instead of competing with 25-30 others and hoping to get the teacher's attention to clarify questions and help individual learning, home schooling gives immediate and unlimited access to the teacher without any associated fears that arise due to potential humiliation or spurning

I admire parents who have dedicated their lives, invested time and energy to equip themselves, and be responsible for their child's education. There is minimal disruptions and wasted time/effort in home schooling as there is no commuting time, recess, breaks between classes. Also, learning can happen at the student's pace - need not be slowed down or hurried as a part of 25-30 diversely equipped class mates. Another big advantage is to provide real-world examples and plan field trips which become difficult for a teacher of 25-30 students to organize and manage.

On the other hand, after much thinking, deliberating, reading up (and being shaken a bit by a documentary I watched last night which fueled my discomfort and prompted this post), I am convinced that the advantages of social schooling far outweigh the disadvantages that come up time and again.

Why I don't like homeschooling?

• Social Skills: whatever said and done, children need to be with peers for at least part of each day, preferably in a diverse group to help them understand how the world works and how best to get adjusted to it
• Potential Indoctrination: Being the only adult my children will interact with if I home schooled them, I am terrified that I will inadvertently and unavoidably disseminate my ideologies as the only right one and subconsciously discourage free thinking
• Lack of Expertise: Can I truly claim to have mastery over all areas of academics to guide my children through the learning process without fumbling around? Why not leave it to the experts (like my mom) who have dedicated their lives to constantly gaining knowledge in their field and training themselves in effective ways to help children discover the knowledge and themselves in the process?
• My Personal Limitations: I may not be able to afford the resources for effective teaching/learning, and I may find out that Patience and Stamina are not my strong traits
• Developing Special Skills: Leadership skills, Negotiating and Mediating skills, Management facilitation skills and such are better identified and allowed to blossom when doing group projects among peers in a social school setting

Anyway, over the years, I have come to appreciate the advantages of formal schooling away from home. Being a product of it myself, and not having experienced home schooling much, I have had this discussion with many colleagues and class mates over the years so I can get a variety of view points.

And, that is exactly one reason I don't like home schooling: no matter how hard I try, I cannot expose my children to a wide array of views by keeping them at home and directing their education, because "Education" is not just acquiring knowledge that has already been accumulated, it involves social skills, critical thinking, knowledge processing, creative expression, reasoning, analyzing, inferring and adapting to environment. Plus much more that I am not able to succinctly convey here...

Socrates argued that education is about drawing out what was already within the student. I remember reading that the word education comes from the Latin e-ducere meaning "to lead out."

One of the early facts that struck me while working on my Master's in Science Education was that the dictionary meaning of the word Education adds little to what is believed to be Education and what Educators strive for. A few quotes gleaned from browsing around:

The central task of education is to implant a will and facility for learning; it should produce not learned but learning people. The truly human society is a learning society, where grandparents, parents, and children are students together. ~Eric Hoffer

No one has yet realized the wealth of sympathy, the kindness and generosity hidden in the soul of a child. The effort of every true education should be to unlock that treasure. ~Emma Goldman

The aim of education should be to teach us rather how to think, than what to think — rather to improve our minds, so as to enable us to think for ourselves, than to load the memory with the thoughts of other men. ~Bill Beattie

So, dear readers, this is a prelude to my October Poll: If you are already home schooling your children, or planning to, please let me know by answering the poll question on the right side bar.

---

Poll Results:



September 2007 Poll & Results

p.s: As for me, my personal choice is not to home school as I feel inadequate and unsure about success, plus I strongly feel home schooling is not a viable option given my current circumstances in life... I do believe in supplementing school education at home and not leave all the burden/responsibility on school teachers. My parents, my brother and even sometimes my cousins and friends helped me learn many things that I didn't quite understand from classroom sessions, so, I am sure Ana will survive social schooling just fine...